Monday, 12 February 2018

Teenagers : What To Expect, How To Deal


Teenagers are young adults between the age of 13-18 years. During these years, teens make a transition from childhood to adulthood. Parents whose children are teenagers are always apprehensive as they are aware of how delicate and important this stage is and how hard it is to understand them. Parents need to be aware of what to expect from the teens and how to deal with them and their actions without much hassle.

Parents are constantly in conflicts with their teenage children due to the following:

I. Cell Phones

Mobile Phone

Teenagers are always in constant fights with the parents over improper use of cell phones and this can be through: late night calls, social media, pornographic messages, images and videos, radicalization messages and pro-longed usage of the device.

Teenagers phones record really high credit and data bills and this can cause conflicts between parents and teenagers.

II. Sex


Having developed and being aware of the changes that occur on their bodies, teenagers are curious to explore and due to this they may indulge in sexual activities. Parents are always protective of their children and such actions may result to conflicts and constant disagreements.

III. Alcohol and drugs


Alcohol is only sold to adults and since teenagers are not adults, they are not granted access to it. Teens find their own means to access alcohol and also drugs that are not only illegal but also harmful. Parents are always against teens who abuse drugs, smoke or even drink alcohol and this may lead to conflicts.

IV. Allowances

As parents provide allowances to their children, some may limit the allowances given to reduce the risks to indulge in immoral activities like drug abuse and the limitation may be a cause of conflict between the parents and their teenagers.

Teenagers may also find odd jobs to increase their allowances and this does not sit well with some parents as they can view it as a way of rebelling or a way to have more money for participating in vices.

V. Pressure

Teenagers are easily influenced by their peers and other adults that they may consider friends or role models. Their behaviors and attitudes may change for the worst when influenced and if their parents address this, they may disagree and might view this as interference.

VI. Refusing To Do Things


All teenagers get rebellious at some point in their lives and this constantly happens when they refuse to do requested duties. This is a source or conflict for most parents and their teens.

VII. Family Traditions

Most families have traditions that they consider a heritage that should be passed on from one generation to the next. Teenagers may find this too much for them to follow as they like identifying themselves with what might be trending.

VIII. Tattoos, Piercings and Hairstyles

Tattoo Artist

Most parents are constantly against tattoos, extreme piercings and funny looking hairstyles. Teenagers on the other hand are always curious and most of them would enjoy having the tattoos and piercings as it appears cool. Parents and Teens are always fighting if parents go against their wish to get their way.

IX. Music

Teens tend to lean on new school music or really loud music that leads to noise. The music they listen to always influence their behaviors and even their dress code. If the parents are against the type of music they are listening to, they end up disagreeing.

X. Curfew

Teenagers constantly bypass the curfew rule by showing up later than expected at home and this constantly land them in trouble with their parents. They consider curfews childish and any attempt to make them follow this rule to the letter leads to disagreements and arguments.

XI. Boyfriends and Girlfriends

As teenagers discover themselves, they may find themselves in romantic relationships and their parents may not agree with this as they find them too young to be getting involved. Teenagers end up arguing with parents over this and may even run away from home.

Due to conflicts and constant disagreements many teenagers are constantly under stress and may fall into depression. They also get suicidal and if issues affecting them are not addressed, they may commit suicide.

Parents on the other hand may find it hard to cope with rebellious and non-corporative teenagers that are constantly in trouble and they may end up giving up on them and may not put any effort to assist them cope with the challenges they may experience during this stage.

To ensure a better relationship between parents and teenagers, always consider the following:

  • Parents and teenagers should respect each others boundaries at all times to reduce conflicts and disagreements that arise constantly due to this.
  • Parents should consider sharing their life experiences with their teenage children to help them understand consequences of some of their actions or even help them make some decisions.
  • Families should consider a system where they celebrate each others achievements. This would encourage sharing and participation in each others lives and even boost self esteem.
  • Parents should consider limiting punishments to enable teenagers explore more without fear and this would reduce secrecy.
  • Teenagers and their parents should also consider spending one on one time together and this would enable them bond and gain trust. This can lead to openness and sharing of expectations and desires which ensures better understanding of each other.
  • Parents should lighten up and be real to issues affecting their teenage children as this would enable them to cope easily with their actions and avoid hide and seek behaviors between parents and teens.
  • Parents should listen more to their teenage kids as they tend to drop hints of what they have done or what they are about to do. This keeps parents aware of what their children are up to at all times.
  • Instill family traditions and religion values without necessarily forcing them to follow them and this would reduce objections and rebellion towards them.
  • If confident enough, allow your teenage child to have a boyfriend or girlfriend on conditions set as this makes them more open on the type of relationships they have.
  • Make decisions together to ensure fairness and also lay down expectations of activities carried out.
  • Establish friendships with teenagers to enable them open up on their undertakings and minimize secrets.
  • Make a point of always explaining why you say no as this would ensure better understanding and better communication amongst yourselves.
  • Reward as often as possible to build morale and self esteem.
  • Parents should take part in their teens activities and hobbies as this would be a beginning to establish a relationship between them.
  • Always keep your promises as this leads to trust and creates a channel for making requests.
  • Provide as much as you can for your teenagers without over doing it. This reduces the risk to indulge in criminal activities to make money.
  • Offer support and counselling to your teenagers and encourage them to speak out as this helps one learn the challenges they are facing and how best to assist them.
  • Allow interactions between your teenagers and other teenagers to assist them share with their peer what they find difficult to share with you.

There are many challenges faced by teenagers and parents and once addressed, raising teenagers becomes easy and fun.

Teenagers : What To Expect, How To Deal

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